I realize it has been a really, really long time since I've had you all over to The Land of Jordan, forgive me, we've been quite busy.
So many things to fill you all in on. Let's start w/the most recent shall we?
Jo-Jo had her first visit to the dentist. Not just your normal every day dentist. Nope. At this particular office it seems if you work there it is a requirement that you be 'on' laughing gas. Honestly the folks there could not have been nicer/sweeter/more giving/more caring. Not only did they ask me 9 times if I wanted something to drink, they even offered to let me have the remote for the TV in the waiting room so I could watch something I was interested in. They have this cool separate play/waiting room for the kids filled w/all kinds of toys, video games, climbing things. When they took us back to the actual 'room' for Jordan's cleaning I was handed 2 free movie tickets: "because you waited longer than 5 minutes for us to call you back here and we do not like to keep our patients waiting longer than 5 minutes." WHAT? Where am I? And can I have some of that laughing gas too? Next they hand me a 'party bag', you know the kind, the ones you get at kids birthday parties......and this was filled w/numerous stickers for Jordan, a tooth brush for Jordan, my movie tix, oh and the very cool new mini-messenger bag I got for being a new patient AND a Dunkin Donuts gift card for $15!!!!!!!! But wait, it gets even better.........b/c my friend Lucy referred me (I put her name down on all that silly paperwork), she (Lucy) got a brand spankin new 10MP DIGITAL CAMERA!!!!!!!!!!! I mean, come on, for real?
So anyway, back to why this trip to the dentist is so important. On this trip Jordan was told by Mr. Dentist that she has to give up her paci b/c it's affecting her bite. At this point I feel the walls beginning to close in on me slowly. Is this guy for real? Does he not understand the value of the paci? The naps? The naps @ the town pool b/c of the paci? The naps on the beach b/c of the paci? You can have your free movie tix, just don't make me take away the paci!
Now we're in the car on the way home from the dentist and my child who I was convinced had not been paying any attention to my conversation w/Mr. Dentist says to me, "Mom, why did that man say I bite the paci b/c I don't Mom, I only just suck on it." I begin to explain how it's not about her biting the paci but how the paci is affecting her bite which leads us into stories of when Mommy was little and used to suck her thumb which leads to how I had braces and then I realized I was just getting way too ahead of myself and somehow was able to divert her attention to something else.
Anyway, I'm all over the place w/this story. So basically we have the conversation w/Jordan about how it's time to give her paci's away b/c there is a baby out there who totally needs a paci or two. We decide last Sunday was going to be "P-day".........so Mommy and Jordan head to the balloon store b/c we are going to buy two balloons (2 pacis to give away) and do just what her buddy Jake did: send the pacis off into the sky and let the paci fairy (lame, I know) take them to a baby who needs them. As we arrive home and Mima sees the two Princess & the Frog balloons I have purchased she lets out a major laugh and proceeds to tell me I bought the wrong kind of balloons and I "should have bought the OTHER kind." What other kind? I'm thinking she's just being very bossy about the whole balloon thing and the two balloons are gonna be fine. We help Jo-Jo tie the pacis to the balloons, we then tie the two balloons together so they can go up at the same time and go to the same place. Jordan decides she wants to send them off from the driveway. So we do this whole ceremonious thing and Mima let's the balloons go......and the 3 of us watch as the two balloons come immediately crashing down onto the driveway, pacis first, b/c apparently I bought the wrong kind of balloons!!! Who the frig knew? So, we remove one paci and it's quickly placed into my pocket w/out Jordan seeing this, and then we decide to try once more w/just the one paci attached. And this time it works! And it's going, it's up, it's headed right to the sky.................that is until it got tangled in our incredibly LARGE trees on the side of our house!!! OMG, what the &*%@?????? So now we have to delve even further into the 'little white lie bank' and tell Jordan how it's all good, no worries b/c that paci fairy is going to come and untangle the balloons when we are not looking and deliver those pacis (one still in my pocket which eventually made it to the garbage) to a baby who needs them.
Turns out the paci fairy comes to our house in the form of our nephew Andrew who will be here tomorrow carrying a BB gun b/c those 2 balloons & paci are STILL hanging in that tree. Luckily Jordan has not spotted them.
So last Sunday we said goodbye to our pacis............but I must not have read the small fine print in the paci contract b/c I was COMPLETELY unaware that when the paci is gone, so are the naps. UGH! It has been 6 days of no napping and tonight it all caught up to Jo-Jo. She was sound asleep by 6:30pm!!!!
Here are a few funny things Jordan has said to me over the past few weeks:
- "Mom, when I get older can I wear 'eye tacts' (contacts) just like Mima?"
- Listening to the radio w/Jordan in the car, I say to her: "Jordan this band is called Green Day" and she says to me: "but Mom, I don't like Green Day, I only like Greenberrys." (a coffee/tea place here in Wayne)
- Upon hearing me become frustrated w/something Jordan always says: "What Mom? Don't worry Mom. It will be okay Mom."
- Jordan knows about my unbelievable fear of spiders so if we are reading one of her books and there's a picture of a spider she says: "You can touch it Mom b/c it's only a pretend spider so go ahead and touch it Mom." And she won't let me turn the page until I have touched the pretend spider.
- "Mom? Why don't you wear dresses?" "I just don't like them Jo-Jo, but I love them on you." "I know Mom, but WHY don't you like them? And why don't you like 'clicky shoes' (dress up shoes) either Mom?"
- "Mom, you like a lot of boy things."
- While at a NY Liberty game Jordan is fascinated by the announcers voice and says, "Where is the narrator man?"
- Jordan and I got into an argument about that silly young singer dude named Justin Bieber......while listening to 'him' on the radio Jordan proceeds to tell me it's a girl singing. So I tell her it's not a girl it's a boy. We begin to go back and forth about this and I realize two things: 1: this is silly to be arguing w/a 3 year old b/c I'm clearly not going to win and 2: he does sound kinda girly.
- Ever since I stopped breast feeding Jordan she has had constipation issues. Long story short, a few months ago we had a situation which required us using a suppository on poor little Jo-Jo. So she says to us, "Can we give the 'appositories' away to another kid who needs them b/c I just don't like the 'appositories'.
- "It's your turn Mom to tell me a story about when you were little b/c I just told you a story about when I was little." So I proceed to tell her a random story about when I was little and when she has had enough she says, "Okay Mom, that's good. Now it's my turn again."
- We had been discussing kittens and the possibility of one day getting one, but not until Nina (the 15 year old cat we have) dies. So I explain to Jordan how we have to wait until Nina dies and goes to heaven, then we can get a kitten. The very next morning Jordan wakes up and says, "Did Nina die yet? Can we get a kitten?"
- And continuing w/the kitten theme...we went to a farmers market a few weeks ago on a Saturday. Someone there was doing kitten/cat adoptions so we went over to watch these 2 adorable kittens get adopted. They were placed in this cardboard carrying box and off they went w/their new owners. So of course Jordan wants to discuss the kitten thing for the rest of the day and wants to know what 'adopted' means. I explain it all to her and then realize, duh, I'm adopted, I can TOTALLY explain this even further, even better! So I proceed to tell Jordan about how when I was a baby I was adopted by Bubby & Pop-Pop. Jordan stops. She's processing the whole thing. And then she says, "But Mom, when you were a baby and you were adopted, did Bubby put you in a cardboard box too?" And that literally made me laugh out loud! What an awesome thing to say!!!!
- And continuing even further w/the kitten theme.....the very next day after that farmers market we went to a strawberry festival out in Chester. Had a great time, ate good, picked great strawberries, was having the best time when all of sudden we noticed they were giving away, for free, kittens. Now I know you guys don't live w/us so you have no clue if Nina has died or not.......well I'm here to tell you Nina is fully alive and healthy. Deal was no kitten until Nina wasn't around. And then Mima comes over holding this teeny, tiny, little soft, fuzzy kitten who had what we thought was a cleft palate, she's showing the kitten to Jordan who is just over the moon in love and is screaming "I GOT A KITTEN" as I'm standing behind her shaking my head NO and mouthing to Mima that we are in NO WAY getting a kitten today......... and the girl on the farm comes over and says, "Nobody will take this kitten b/c of her cleft palate, she's the unwanted kitten." I immediately take the kitten from Mima and exclaim loudly and proudly: "We are taking this kitten! You can not leave a kitten behind! The unwanted ones are the best ones!" And we now have Nina and the kitten w/not a cleft palate but a cleft lip who we allowed Jordan to name...........and she named her "George." (thought George was a boy at first, but we love the name so much we didn't want to change it when we found out George is a girl)
I believe, for now, that is all from The Land of Jordan.
I shall attempt to be like my friend Gina and update you all much more often but now that naps have disappeared...........who has time?
